It has been 21 days since my rabbits completed their lives together. Yesterday I decided I could re arrange their room slightly so that I could fit in some physio equipment and build my physical strength with them as they once built my mental strength. Today I built a gym bench in there and the grief at this strange metal and rubber invader in their sacred space crushed me.
Im including what i consider to be a very personal picture because it hurts me to look at it, you can see how I've pushed things around slightly including the cardboard chaos at the back
I wrote about it again
I knelt on the floor,
the air still heavy with your scent,
hay, warmth, a trace of fur and dust
that time can’t wash away.
The bolts turned beneath my hands
as I began a new construction,
metal meeting memory.
For a moment it hurt,
then longer than a moment.
It crushed me when I saw
the final shape sitting there,
solid and strange,
where you once rested.
Grief rose in my chest
and I wanted to stop.
But I remembered my promise,
that I would keep moving,
keep living,
make you proud.
You carried me
through the noise in my head,
through storms that silence used to hide.
Now the quiet is louder than it’s ever been,
and I sit in it, alone,
trying to become the peace
you once gave me.
So I built through the ache,
slow breath after breath,
bolt after bolt,
until the weight became something else.
The room felt different,
but not empty.
Spirit and Sienna,
you are still here with me,
in the quiet,
where the silence
breathes your names
and does not end.
by J_rd_nRD