Yesterday I had to make the painful decision to say goodbye to my 10 year old bunny Luna, and I can’t stop thinking that I did something wrong or should have taken him to the vet sooner.
Luna has always been prone to stasis (like every other month he would have an episode), so we’ve always had a specific way of dealing with it (vet approved) when he would begin to show signs. About a month or two ago, his poops started to get smaller on and off. This is the usual a sign that he’s having GI issues prior to stasis, so we would increase his hay, sprinkle more water on his greens, monitor his water intake, and hold back on treats (treats were Oxbow/Sherwood supplement cookies and an occasional freeze dried banana chip). We would also give him Cat Lax (as per our vet) and/or baby gas drops if he went more than a day with small poops or seemed to be struggling. This would usually set him right again.
At the end of November, we moved into a new house and he was doing surprisingly well despite the stress. He seemed happy with his new room, curious, and otherwise healthy for an old bun. The only thing wrong was that he seemed to be having a little trouble with his back legs. I didn’t think much of it since he was an old guy, had arthritis (we gave him supplements for this and had metacam on hand for really bad days), and his new room was carpeted rather than hardwood. He still got around ok, albeit a little limpy. He didn’t seem in any pain at all when I would physically check his legs and hips each night. He was limping this way for a couple weeks, but no major changes that concerned me.
A few days before Christmas, I went in to his room to hang out with him and he was acting strange. He seemed like he was in a daze, not at all excited to see me and didn’t seem interested in anything really. This was the first major red flag, so I looked him over. His poos were small again and fewer, and it didn’t seem like he had eaten much of his hay (though he did eat his greens). Again, since he’s prone to stasis, this isn’t uncommon so I did what I usually do.
Unfortunately, this didn’t fix the issue. His cecotropes also suddenly became mushy and stuck to his bottom. This definitely wasn’t normal, so I called the vet and asked if they could refill a bottle of cisapride just in case since the holiday was a couple days away and I knew they would be closed. They did, but unfortunately they were already closed when we went to pick it up so we had to wait until after Christmas. Meanwhile, I continued our usual procedure. He was eating and drinking fine, but I withheld his greens for a night to see if it would help with the cecotropes.
On Christmas Eve, I went into his room to find him on his side in his house and looking delirious. I panicked, made him a salad, and he devoured it and perked back up pretty quickly. Needless to say, I watched over him the rest of the night and he seemed better. Ate his hay, drank from his bowl, took his meds like a champ (supplement and a dose of metacam), and let me groom him and snuggle after.
Anyway, after Christmas I started noticing that he was having even more trouble with his back legs to the point he was sometimes dragging them. He was still eating and drinking, and the metacam seemed to help a little. However, he was also having trouble with poopy butt. His regular poops were golden and perfect size, but his cecotropes were still soft and at one point liquid. We gave him gentle sponge baths and kept him as clean as possible. We also started him on a bunny probiotic on his greens, and his cecotropes were starting to look a little more formed but still mushy and not how they should be. He would still eat them, but I had to feed them to him since he was having trouble getting into position to get to them.
All signs seemed like he was slowly getting back to normal aside from his back legs, which I had planned to make an appointment to get checked out once we got past New Years.
He seemed to improve for a couple more days and he seemed genuinely curious, a little more playful, interested in what I was doing, moving around a bit more, snuggly and getting back to his old self. But then the other night (Monday) he just took a horrible turn. He wouldn’t get up on his own, and I had to administer the metacam, cisapride, and feed him with Critical Care (he shoved his face in the bowl and devoured it). His poops were small and few, and he was so weak he kept falling in his bowls while trying to eat and drink. I slept next to his house that night so I could check on him (I heard him eating hay and drinking), and I called the vet in the morning to get him in just in case he was dehydrated and needed fluids. I laid down for about an hour or two more, and when I got up he looked like he was really struggling so I called the vet and they said to bring him immediately.
The vet said his skin was jaundiced and he had edema in his back legs which pointed to either liver failure or heart failure (or both). His BP was way off where it should be and he was non-reactive through the exam. She said they could run bloodwork and do X-rays to try and find a cause, but that it wouldn’t change anything and that the best thing at that point would be to say goodbye. I typically trust her judgment, and I asked a few more questions about fluids and medications. She said at this point nothing would really reverse things.
But now I’m having a really hard time wondering if I did something wrong that led to this outcome. I feel like if I would have taken him in sooner, we might have caught his decline early and maybe something could have been done. Or that maybe I was too aggressive in giving him meds not knowing if he was having liver or heart issues. Maybe I should have insisted on having the tests run, but at the time I didn’t want to put him through any additional trauma.
I’m just so sad, angry at myself, and second guessing everything. I keep blaming myself, and I’m spiraling. Luna was my soul bunny. We’ve had him since he was a tiny baby. We had a very strong bond, and I feel like a piece of my soul was ripped out. I’m also terrified that I might mess up with my other furbabies.
My vet said sometimes these things just suddenly happen, especially in senior buns…but I’m having a hard time taking those words to heart. I wish I could go back and do some things differently, but I know I can’t. I’m usually very attuned to my furbabies’ needs and extremely proactive where it comes to keeping them healthy. I need to know if I did something wrong. 😔
by Apprehensive_Onion53